Yeap. I am still here. My schedule to record a new podcast or post a new entry on this blog is...when I decide that I want to! I am working on other projects. In fact I am enrolled in film school so I will be busy with other things but from time to time I will come back to continue to keep giving you crap to read while you are at work and trying to kill time.
I just signed up for a new social networking app called Tout. I think one of it's financial backers is the WWE formerly known as WWF. No not the Word Wildlife Fund, but the company that gave birth to such household names as Hulk Hogan, Andre The Giant, and Bobby Heenan.
A quick read of what the app does tells me that it allows you to record 15 second videos that you can then "Tout" (send out) to your followers. Or something to that effect.
I like the fact that it limits it to 15 seconds. Kind of like the video version of Twitter and Tweets.
Let's be honest. No one has something interesting to say. What's my definition of "interesting" you ask? Well in this instance I define interesting as something that is of cultural significance or of great importance. Like the movies "Annie Hall" and "Back to the Future"
How do I know they are culturally significant?
Both of those movies have been selected for preservation in the United States National Film Registry by the Library of Congress as being "culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant".
I chose two different types of movies to prove that there's different types of "interesting or significant" in my estimation. In fact if we had a Venn Diagram...member those?
I don't imagine that there would be too many people that like BOTH of those movies. (those would be the people that are in the center or "overlap". Are you really that stupid?)
They speak to two different audiences and two types of VERY different people. I like both so I'm officially more interesting than you. Which is just my personal opinion...which are like assholes...which are like facebook accounts...which are like meaningless posts and tweets...
Most of the things that I tweet or post on this blog could also count as "not interesting". Though if you have read this far you are probably smart enough to realize that from time to time I do have something "interesting to discuss" or you're a complete loser. If your motivation is to read this blog, think about what I write, come away with ideas that you can implement into your life...then you're probably an intellectual and probably interesting.
On the other hand if your motivation is to read this and critique what I say or post a comment that says something lame like "F_ck You"...then you're probably a big fat loser that THINKS they are more important than you really are. I can promise you that at this point of history, no one has become culturally signifcant by posting an f bomb. Maybe if you were the first...but you're not. I can't tell you which one you are, in your HEART, though... you know which one you are.
The guy that invented facebook? Culturally signifcant.
Most of the people that post and have accounts on facebook? Irrelevant.
Notice I used the phrase "Most of the people". Read carefully. Or at the very least learn how to read and think.
I digress. Now as per my definition of interesting most people don't have anything interesting to say anywhere on social media or just in general. I doubt that people will agree with this opinion. Know why? What's everyone's favorite topic?
It's true. I didn't say that you believe that or like that idea I just think it's the truth. Or at the very least it's my opinion..which are like a-holes...which are like facebook accounts...which are like meaningless posts and tweets...everyone has one.
So what does that mean? Everyone THINKS they are interesting. The reality is that, well, you're probably not as interesting as you THINK you are or at all for that matter. I include myself in this group. What kind of crap do I post on my facebook and twitter? Things about the Yankees, jokes, just junk really. Empty calories in essence.
What do I mean by "empty calories"? I'll give an example. If you are very hungry and you grab a bag of potato chips, do you feel satisfied? Maybe momentarily while you are chomping away at your cheap ass greasy bag of chips but as soon as that bag is gone, you realize you ate nothing. You are still hungry because you ate junk. There's not much, if any, nutritional value within a small bag of chips. "Garbage in, Garbage out."
You would have been better off eating a chicken tender. Which is an ok choice but what if you actually ate a grilled chicken breast. You'd feel more satisfied and not hungry. Right? Add some brown rice and some vegetables...holy shiite. A MEAL!
WHY AREN'T YOU HUNGRY YOU ASK? The chicken breast has substance to it. Nutrional value. Vegetables are good for you. Brown Rice. That's carbs. Good stuff right? Better than potato chips. Right?
So...think about what you read. If you know how to read. National Enquirer? 50 shades of Grey? TMZ "Garbage in, Garbage out."
Think about what you watch. Honey Boo Boo? Jersey Shore? The Real World? "Garbage in, Garbage out."
Think about your favorite public speaker. Joel Osteen? "Garbage in. Garbage out."
What's my point? My point is that what you post on facebook, twitter, and anywhere else is most likely a bag of chips.
Cheap filler for the moment, but nothing substantial.
Don't get me wrong. I LOVE POTATO CHIPS. ICE CREAM. But you won't be healthy if that's ALL YOU EAT.
So think about my metaphor.
You're kids aren't that interesting. Especially when you post about them. When they make you a happy father's day card, yea, you THINK that's interesting. It's not. Know why? MILLIONS of children do that from coast to coast. YOU THINK it's interesting because it's YOUR FUCKING KID. But people outside your social circle DON'T CARE.
It's also possible that...wait for it...people WITHIN YOUR social circle DON'T CARE. GASP!!!
I never said that what I had to say was popular or true, they are just my opinions. As we know by now...opinions are like a-holes...which are like facebook accounts...which are like meaningless posts and tweets...EVERYONE has one.
But if your 18 year old child won a 100 million dollar lottery that's interesting. Know why? Not that many people do that. I'm sure that kid will have new friends. To be fair it's interesting, but it's luck. Any asshole can pick numbers and get lucky.
Know what's more interesting than that? If your kid plays golf and becomes the youngest and most successful golfer up to that point in the history of mankind, that's very interesting. Know why? Lots of people try to be successful at golf. Very few are. Even fewer can make a legitimate living at it. Only one gets to be "best in the world". Throw in that he is the first black guy to do it...now you got a story.
His name is...Tiger Woods.
Then you find out he's an addict, his wife finds out about his "indiscretions"... then he goes back to being irrelevant because there's some sort of stigma associated with that behaviour (Yes I spelled behaviour with the letter "u" because I'm classy).You're dirty if you act like that and so on. Tiger Woods. That guy is interesting. There's ONE Tiger Woods. There's MILLIONS OF KIDS that draw father's day cards.
(As an aside...have you ever noticed that Hugh Hefner never gets called out for what many believe to be "immoral behaviour"? I wonder if his magazine empire is culturally signifcant.)
ANYWAY...I like TOUT. I think I'll give it a shot. I'll try to post "interesting" things on there most of the time. But sometimes ICE CREAM is good. Just not for EVERY MEAL and it's not a meal replacement. Those things are powdered and need a blender.
You are allowed to comment on this. You're allowed to comment on any of my posts in fact. But when your comment is something like "you suck" or "you're hack"...it just proves my point.
You're not as interesting or as important as you THINK you are. You can keep telling yourself you are...but you're not.
Just embrace this reality then you wouldn't have to post stuff like that. It's just you projecting that you have failed in the game of life. Have a great day!